Saturday, July 26, 2014

Décisions, Décisions!

These past few days have seen a lot of unexpected changes to my plans for France! I was under the impression that I would be an au pair for a family in Saint Etienne... until I found out my French contact never passed along my information to the family. Unfortunately, they were unaware of my interest and chose another au pair. I was incredibly distraught because I had my heart set on this lifestyle that would allow me peace of mind with my finances, while also letting me live in the heart of downtown Saint Etienne. Mais, c'est la vie...

My little pity-party lasted for most of the morning, but by afternoon I had made a profile on aupair-world and began my search for other families in the area. Within an hour I had contacted three potential families, though all on the outskirts of Saint Etienne,  and one wanted to talk to me right away. Later that afternoon, I was able to speak with them on the phone and learn a little bit about what they were looking for and what the expectations would be. Today, I Skyped with them and their two boys and discussed things more in depth.

But then I was incredibly divided between my desire to work and live as an au pair and my interest in living in downtown Saint Etienne where I may have the opportunity to be more social and flexible.


I have spent the greater majority of the past two days really considering every potential outcome and all the dreaded "what-if's"-- a true specialty of mine. What really helped me come to a sound decision was to just stop myself and think about WHY I worked so hard to get myself back to France and what I wanted to gain from another experience living there.
  1. To truly immerse myself in the language and culture.
  2. To become as fluent in French as possible.
  3. To challenge myself with a new teaching experience-- teaching English, in French, to grade school children.
  4. To work in the French school systems-- something I may want to pursue full time later in my profession.
  5. To explore a new region of France, both large cities and small.
Before I talk about my decision, I just want to say THANK YOU to all of you that put in an enormous effort to give me such genuinely thoughtful and caring advice. Not only did I receive plenty of comments on Facebook; but also texts, calls, emails throughout the day-- all helping me to see valid pros and cons of each opportunity. I truly feel so lucky that so many of you, some who I haven't seen or spoken to in a long time, cared enough and took the time to help me out. Merci beaucoup a vous!

Ultimately, whether I live in an apartment downtown or live with a family in a suburb, both are fantastic opportunities that make a dream come true for me. My sorority sister, Kelsie, told me not to look at it as a win/lose situation-- and she's completely right! Both are excellent chances for me and I needed to look at it that way.

For me and my experience, I have decided that I think it is most beneficial for me (all around) to live and work as an au pair in Saint Chamond. So many of you brought up extremely valid points of concern in terms of potentially being too busy or not having time to myself to explore and meet people. I brought these concerns up with the family and they are 100% supportive of helping me make a real life in France. In reality, I was worried about being too bored only teaching 12-20 hours a week and had actually considered offering to help out around the schools to occupy my time. Here are some of the really positive points, in my opinion, of living and working with this family.
  • They are completely flexible with my hours-- I would work about 20 hours a week, when combined with my 20 hours of teaching, I'll be working full-time. However, they are happy to allow me 1-2 full days off a week as well as free time nearly every evening.
  • They have never had an au pair before and are a couple in their early thirties. Already I have seen how open-minded they are to adjusting my position to help suit me. They are truly interested in helping me live an authentic life and want to make me part of their family. 
  • They have offered me a newly renovated room in their home with its own private bathroom. I found out today that the room even has outside access and its own key, so that I could come and go as I please without disturbing them or their kids late at night.
  • They are allowing me access to a car to use both to help get their kids places, but also for me to be able to go downtown in the evenings and use it for myself.
  • They want to allow me the opportunity to vacation with them-- not as a full time employee. Sure, I may babysit a little bit, but they have said that they want to spend their vacations with their kids and want to share the traveling opportunities with me. That being said, they have also told me that I am completely free to go on my own vacations and not work during that time. Either way they are flexible and want me to make the most of my return to France. They have already invited me to spend Christmas with them since they were sad to hear I wouldn't be flying back to the States to visit my family.
  • They only live 15 minutes away from the city of Saint Etienne, so I will still have an easy time spending time with other assistants downtown.
  • They want to learn about the American culture just as much as they want to help me learn more about French culture.
  • They will be giving me a place to live, free of any expenses. It allows me to relax about my financial situation and use the money I might have used on rent to visit friends around Europe, like Sarah in Italy or Adrienne up near Paris. I truly do not have enough money to bring over and feel comfortable. Also, I will not be making enough money to get me into that comfort zone. I had planned on being able to save up a lot more, but unfortunately it did not happen the way I intended. 
  • They only need my help 7-8am and then from 4:30-7pm or so, and then the kids go to bed close to 8pm. I will still have free time throughout the day, depending on my teaching schedule, to meet up with other assistants or do some exploring of Saint Etienne on my own.
  • They are REALLY nice and very laid back. Plus, their kids are adorable. 
  • I intend to go back to France again and get a masters in French/English linguistics-- that would allow me one to two years of living in a larger city in an apartment. Currently, I am looking into Lille, though it won't be for another couple years at least.
  • I really, really, like working with kids, and it's less of a job than you might think.
  • If all goes well, I could be forming a true bond with this family that could continue into the future, as I experienced with the family I babysat for as a teen.
Whew. That was a lot. Congrats if you made it this far!

I've gone back and forth a lot, but in the end I really think this is best for me, my personality, my goals, and my career in education. Again, thank you to everyone who helped me in this process. I truly took into consideration everything that everyone said and it all played a part for me and my decision.  I look forward to hearing your thoughts about it and hope you enjoy following me along in this adventure! A bientot!

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